Sunday, March 20, 2011

In Need

Mis Amigos,

I need your tremendously brilliant minds to come up with some ingenious plotting! I need some ideas for my story as to what obstacles a young woman would face were she stranded alone in an abandoned church. There are traps set up in order to hurt and maim her, but not to kill her. I already have had her crossing a threshold of glass and encountering acid on the floor and railing of steps.

I need at least two more encounters that she may face. Remember, she is in utter darkness and unable to see anything.


Saturday, March 19, 2011

Phantom EFX


I thought that I would share something with you that I love. It's a wonderful interactive game that I spend way too much time playing. It is called Reel Deal Casino Live from Phantom EFX. It is the first fully interactive casino, which you pay no money for, unless you subscribe. The slots are totally cool and completely free! You earn achievements on the slots, complete quests from different areas and from NPCs. If you subscribe you can either get one or two free slots per month.

There are loads of slots or table games that you can play, if you are more into tables than slots. There is definitely something for everyone. So come and join the fun by downloading RDL at today!


Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Eternal Chance

Ah, mi amores,

Here is the prologue of a book that I am *attempting* to write, along with my BFF! Exciting. This is the first project that I've started that wasn't a short story that I actually feel confident I can finish (there have been short stories pushed aside LOL).

This is the project I referenced earlier. It is about vampires and demons and gods, but down here on Earth. Actually, it takes place mostly in a hospital psychiatric ward. Female patients from the hosptial (all different floors and units) and a girl who is half vampire/half god goes undercover at the hospital because there is a vampire who is working there as a psychiatrist and she believes that he is the one responsible. With the help of a fellow patient, a teenager who can see the deaths of the recently deceased, she embarks on the quest for truth.

I hope that you enjoy immensely, and be generous in feedback!



Darkness, that's all there was, the rest of the world ceased to exist. Not a glimmer of light was let into the room, if that's even what it was. Although it might be plausible that there were not even be windows to let in the light. Was it daylight already, or was the moon still high in the sky? Too many questions, with not nearly enough answers. Dark panic is all that surrounded her, like a velvet coat, wrapped tight like a second skin. Maybe I went blind, she thought to herself. The thought wasn't nearly as comforting as she had hoped. The automatic blinking of her eyes told her she still had that functionality, so it wasn't a problem where she unknowingly still had her eyes closed. Maybe the hospital had lost power, and the generator wasn't working. That would explain why the emergency back up lights hadn't come on. Someone would come in and check on her soon, she just had to sit tight until then.

It was at that moment when she realized that she was indeed in a sitting position, which was strange. Shouldn't she be laying down, if she were in her hospital bed? She reached her hand out, to see if she could feel the edge of the dresser. There was nothing to grab a hold of, no bed rails or dresser. In fact, during her arms length exploration, she felt underneath her, and found that she wasn't even in her bed. Instead her fingertips grazed hard cold stone. It felt gritty and coarse, like concrete or cinder blocks. She was propped in the corner, on the floor; she was able to feel the two walls meeting at her back.

She strained her eyes and ears, hoping for something that would give away her location, but it was just as silent as it was dark. With the walls at her back, she knew she was in some sort of structure. Buildings have doors, which means that there was a way out. She had been surprised that she wasn't bound and had been able to move her hands and arms. She wasn't sure why someone would go to the trouble of taking her from the hospital, and then leave her in a room unties and able to escape.

Upon attempting to stand, she realized that there was a sharp stabbing pain in her head. Did someone hit her over the head? Had she been drugged? Using the wall at her back for support, she slowly slid her body upright. Unfortunately, the new perspective of her prison didn't provide her any more light in which to see.
With the adrenaline coursing through her veins, she pushed away from the wall, propelling herself a few steps forward. Screaming, she stumbled back into her corner, collapsing back on the ground. With tears streaming down her face, she reached towards her feet. Biting her bottom lip, she felt along the sole until her fingers gingerly bumped against a jagged edge. Feeling her way against the protruding object she realized it was small. After taking a deep breath to brace herself, she pinched her fingers together along the smooth surface and pulled the shard of glass away from her skin.

With a cry of victory she threw the glass to the side. Her triumph was short lived however when during further exploration of her feet, she discovered at least a dozen other pieces of glass had been embedded into her feet. They ranged from slivers to large shards. In defeat, she slumped back against the wall, slightly rapping her head on the wall. "Just great," she muttered with a sigh of resignation.

Above her head, she heard a slight crackling noise. Cocking her head to one side, she tried to discern what could be its source. A few seconds later, it became more a loud buzzing. To her, it almost made the room appear to be vibrating. The sound began to pierce her ears and make her want to crawl out of her skin.
As suddenly as the sound had started, it stopped. She was panting, with her hands pressed tight against her ears when she shouted, " What do you want from me?"

She wasn't really expecting an answer when she heard a voice reply, "I want to see how long you can survive."

Tuesday, March 8, 2011


You say it
“I don’t love you”.
But I don’t believe you
You won’t look at me,
Can hardly say it

I can’t believe it
Now I know the truth
I walked away
And you let me go.
Yet I have my doubts
Maybe it’s the same for you too

I hear your softly spoken words
They won’t leave my head
And now I’ve gone
And messed it all up.
But it had crumbled
Fell down long before.

I can’t believe it
Now I know the truth
I walked away
And you let me go.
Now you’ve walked away.

Monday, March 7, 2011

The Truth of the Matter

It’s not easy walking in this world, pretending to be something that you are not. Even when you have gone your entire life with the people around you only having met this fa├žade that you have created. Let me tell you, it is hard living up to the standards and expectations that you put on your fake self. Everything has to be just right. Heaven forbid the real you peek out ever. It would lead to disastrous results. Who would want you then? You can never let the world you have created slip, for even a second. The zombie can never be revealed for what it is. The empty shell that you are, which nothing can fill, can ever be cracked.
It would be akin to someone cracking an egg. What happens then? What is expected? I think the world would go mad if suddenly one Sunday morning, you were standing at your stove in the kitchen, frying pan abuzz, and you cracked that shell, and nothing. No yellow yolk surrounded by that filmy clear meniscus sliding out. You would be left there apron and all, stunned. Absolutely astounded by the fact that what you have come to expect after all of these years, suddenly ceased to exist.
What would you say then, if you were to know the truth about me? How would you react knowing that I am as equally hollow as that egg shell you cracked that Sunday morning for your breakfast? I was no longer dependable. I was different. The illusion, the magic, is broken. I’m a fraud. I am not, nor have I ever been, what I appeared to be. I’m not that quiet, shy 26 year old girl that you met back when she wore pigtails in elementary school, or braces in high school. She wasn’t even the boisterous and creative person that you met in drama class. I am none of these things.
Don’t get me wrong. There are people who have seen glimmers of me. My family, when I was young and not as skilled as I am today, saw pieces of me growing up. They know the truth, or at least, a version of it. Albeit, a more accurate than that of which I have painted to most people since my adolescent years. But, even they have let their minds deceive them into thinking most of what I was is behind me now. Their minds betray the reality of that which stares them in the face. They are unable and unwilling to look past the lies and the assurances for the signs of the truth which they know lurk in the shadows beside me.
There is a reality that is real only to me. I live a life that no one is privy exists. The fear, the sorrow the emptiness, it is mine alone.  If you were able to see into my world, I fear that you would not find your way out of the twisted bowels that I call my mind. You may wonder, and ask yourself, what could be so terribly wrong with this seemingly normal girl. What afflicts her so terribly? Why does she feel the need to hide and shield herself? But, my friend, it is not I that I am shielding. The world is not ready for my reality, so in essence, it is the world which I shield and protect. For there are some that I have gentle feelings towards, and I believe that if they were to ever know what lies inside of me, it would leave them forever altered by the darkness.
The darkness isn’t always there, but it is never far, and on occasion finds me when I least expect it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s always lingering, so it isn’t necessarily a surprise. But I have found that when things are going exceedingly well, that they diminish over time. The darkness and emptiness will not let themselves be forgotten and be put on the back burner for long. So in the end, they are my only companions, the only constant in this ever changing world.
I used to believe that I was just making a series of bad decisions and that the choices I made were in bad judgment. But, sitting here, I have come to realize that it could not be helped. It wasn’t that the decision was wrong, or that which I believed turned out to be incorrect, but merely my true self revealing itself and telling me that it was once again time to embrace the darkness. When I would take a good hard look, I would realize then that my shell was still empty. That which made me laugh and sing didn’t even scratch the surface or make a mark on who, or what, I am.
I sit here, almost afraid to reveal myself to you. I know your curiosity about my darkness has been piqued. Almost on the edge of your seat aren’t you? I am afraid that the big reveal would be something of a letdown, on both our parts. It isn’t terribly exciting or unique. But, it is who I am and how I live my life.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

The Good and Bad of Buying a House

Like many working class American people today, I am currently in the market to buy my first house. I can afford a decent house, although the amount that I can actually afford to spend each month on a mortgage brings my buying price slightly below the average in the area I am looking at. But, I am the eternal optimist and believe that if I do whatever necessary, I will be in a new house (new to me, at least) within the next 3-4 months.

The downside, when I started, my credit was oh-so-less-than-perfect. I had credit cards from when I was in college and not working, and some from when I was in the middle of a divorce and jobless and unable to make my monthly payments, plus those ghastly medical bills that appear out of no where because I had insurance that should have taken care of everything minus my co-payment. Trust me, all of these things amount to a low credit score. Not to mention, not understanding all of this, and applying for credit, even when I was pretty sure that it wouldn't be granted, yes those inquiries really do bring down your credit score.

Thankfully, I recently found a company who seems interested in helping me. So, back when I first gott in contact with my mortgage consultant, he pulled my credit and sent me a copy so that I could see what was being reported to all three credit reporting agencies. That allowed me the ability to see what I needed to fix and dispute. I made a list of all of my collection accounts, amounts, and what/when I thought I could pay them.

This fueled the fire to my quest. My quest was to get as much of the negative items off of my credit report as possible. I went to all three websites and just disputed EVERYTHING. Even if I thought or knew it to be valid as belonging to me. Thankfully, I got results in that 80% of the negative items either deleted or status changed to show all payments were received on time. Once everything was in, and it went to the underwriters, the only issue they had were my collection accounts that were non-medical. With the items being deleted or paid, it brought my credit above what it needed to be in order to get approved for a FHA mortgage.

Now onto the hunt for the perfect house. So, just remember, do not despair, and think positively. I was able to go from too low to even be considered to mortgage worthy in a little over a month. You just have to put your mind to it, and look for the right lender who is willing to take what you have to offer. They are in the business of wanting your money, they aren't making money if they don't get mortgages approved. So, dispute everything and pay off any remaining collection bills. If you are going for an FHA mortgage, pay your non-medical collections and keep your receipts that show they are paid in full, just in case they aren't updated on your credit report!

In the end, you may have a smaller down payment, but as long as you have at least 3.5% then you should be in business.

Happy Hunting!

Saturday, March 5, 2011


So I have some new information regarding the story currently being written. There are going to be girls held, one at a time, in an old abandoned church. Their job is to try to escape the maze in total darkness, and avoid the traps left for them. The glitch? The madman holding these female prisoners has no intention of them ever leaving, dead or alive...

Gotta love the creative juices flowing! ;)

Tuesday, March 1, 2011


So, my best friend and I are writing a book and I need a little bit of inspiration. There is going to be an abandoned building where girls are left to try to find their way out, in complete darkness, but there are traps all over, leading to injuries. Some help as to what type of building it should be and different things that could be set up to happen to the girls would be AWESOME! :)

mucho amore!!!